Can't you see her with her arms wide open...

So I signed up on Match at the end of September. I was planning on waiting until the divorce was final on Oct. 11th, since I wasn't sure how dating would affect the custody issues and really who wants to date someone that is still married? Then the trial was pushed back to December and like I said I was tired of having nothing to do on my weekends without the girls. I did call my lawyer and ask him if it was all right! Of course this was also when I thinking I couldn't keep my old friends anymore because of STBX and everything. I've since changed my mind about that (again) and so my non-dating social life has picked up too, but that's a whole 'nother story.
Back to Match... I'm not sure what I was expecting. I was not expecting what actually happened, that's for sure. Maybe my expectations were a little too high. OK, OK of course they were. It's sad how hopeful I still am after everything that's happened...
So I found 2 interesting guys right away. And I was emailing 3 others that also had potential. One nice thing about online dating is that you can sort of tell how interesting they are going to be, both from their profile and from their emails. And you can hope that if they are good at conversing by email then they will be easy to talk to in person. You have some idea of their intelligence and the depth of their personality and these things are all important to me this time around. This has really been a learning process. I've done things just a little bit differently every time. It's like a really interesting social experiment for me, the problem is people just aren't as interested in discussing it as I am. I ended up meeting two of them in person, and seeing one of them several times. I have learned, oh I have learned so much in such a short time. Some of it I already knew and just needed a little reminder. (thanks, bachelor #2) I know, I know Tasha I need to not take it so seriously, it should be fun, blah, blah, blah. But it ended up being just another thing that I had to do, and I'm very busy as it is. So much of my time is not my own and I resented having more work to do. I felt like I had to reply to these emails and try to be my best funny, attractive self. I felt pressure to pick the perfect fun thing to do or place to go when I really don't care about that stuff, I just care about finding someone I want to be with, who wants to be with me. I'm a little different, I'm not for everyone and I'm perfectly OK with that. I'm pretty picky about the people I hang out with too, I don't want to spend my valuable free time with just anyone.
I was on match for 14 days. I will probably unhide my profile eventually, maybe even soon. Or maybe I will go to a whole new site all together. B has had good luck with Cupid he says, although I noticed a lot of the same guys there! That speed dating sounds like fun, I think I make an OK first impression, so I would try that just to see what it was like. It was nice to have people to talk to, just not so many of them! Hmmm, I think I just contradicted myself there a little bit... Now of course I have a better idea of what to expect. And a bit tougher skin on my poor little heart...